Tag: codependency

I always thought that my dad was codependent. I saw his neediness around my mother, his sister, his sister in law and anyone else around that offered their help. But then I saw his neediness around me after he moved in with my husband and I. I constantly felt pressured to cater to his needs while at the same time, making sure I cater to my own needs as well. Then I noticed that sometimes I didn’t even cater to my own needs because his needs were very demanding on me. Then it dawned on me – maybe he is not only codependent on me, but I am also equally, or even MORESO codependent on HIM! Wow, what a trip…. to discover my own codependency on my needy elderly father. I realized that the only reason I would sacrifice my own needs to cater to his was to get something I needed out of him, and for the longest time, I had known that I wanted his love and approval but by his own neediness, I know that I will never get it to the extent that I feel I need it. Sure he loves me, but unless he starts feeling whole within himself will he start accepting me truly as I am.